Culture, Life

Facing Life Full On

You don’t have to participate in the society that people who hate you and your values created. That’s the truth. I never thought I’d be standing on the stage suggesting that people opt out of the popular society, but that is exactly what I’m suggesting.” ~Tucker Carlson

Way finding. Engineering your life. That’s exactly what I’ve been preaching lately and that’s exactly why, when I heard Tucker Carlson’s long soliloquy on the topic of how to manage in a world that is hell-bent on eliminating your “kind,” I knew it was important to share this weighty matter. (It goes right in there with Lifestyle Mapping and Finding Your Purpose.)

What Kind of Glass do You Have?

You know that famous question about whether the glass is half empty or half full? I asked my other half once whether I was the glass-is-half-full sort or the glass-is-half-empty. It was worse than I expected. With a smile he said, “You are the-glass-is-broken kind of person.” Ouch. that hurt. Okay, I had it coming and it is actually. . .true. Since then I have striven to be a there-is-no-glass kind of person. You know. . .where things just sort of flow and I no longer expect the glass to hold anything, because there isn’t one.

Know what that means? If there is no glass, there is nothing to maintain — nothing to hold and nothing to lose. Everything is just what it is and my control or lack thereof does not change anything. I can let go and be who I really am. And here is where I decided to be — writing this piece for people like you. That’s because I am a writer by nature, but just as important, someone who cares about people and making their lives better. It has always been my dream to make the world better by writing, though I didn’t always know what that would look like.

I spent most of my life torn between what I really wanted and the “practical” things people in the know told me I should do first in order to get from point A to point B.  What I thought I needed to do to survive until I got that carrot on the end of the stick actually destroyed the core of all that I valued and loved. You see, I loved the goal but hated the journey, because the journey itself kept detouring me from Point B. I suppose there was a silver lining to it all. . .

This year I started over, my way — from the gut. I felt like a little hobbit returning to the Shire after saving Middle Earth. I didn’t care about the accolades of heroic battles. I just wanted the familiarity of my friends and family after the long, long journey. Workplace trends had changed and they increasingly violated all that I held to be good and true and humane. Not everyone agrees with me, but I no longer care because I have been to the mountain top, as Martin Luther King Jr. once said. It’s heady stuff.

Surviving the Decline of Western civilization

Gage Skidmore from Surprise, AZ, United States of America, CC BY-SA 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons

More of a universal humanitarian than a political soul, I shoot for topics that can help the average person mark out a meaningful path. So, I don’t really care what anyone thinks of my quoting political commentator Tucker Carlson of Fox News. The fact is, that he struck the chord I care most about: People. People striving to survive and wishing their lives had some purpose. People who are thwarted from doing anything constructive by the raging forces around them. And, frankly, I am sick of seeing people ripped off by empty promises from educators, politicians, career counselors, life coaches, etc., etc. And I agree one hundred percent with Carlson on the whole matter of deciding what to do with one’s life, one’s time on earth. The foregoing morons aren’t going to help you. You have to decide what you want, go against the tide if that’s what it takes, and take the bull by the horns.

So here are some of the most important things I gleaned from Carlson’s speech with the best parts (in my opinion) bolded. And I really hope it helps you find your way toward the most important goals and values you have. You really don’t have to find your way in life and work the way it’s always been done. If the way it’s been done no longer works, break the glass, sweep it out of here, and find a way that has meaning for you.

See the full video or read the full transcript.

Truth Bombs for the Young (and anyone else) from Tucker Carlson

Jahobr, CC0, via Wikimedia Commons

. . . I reassessed a lot of the things I think are the worst about American society, and I began to realize those things aren’t necessarily left-wing values. They’re corporate values. So if you’re running a company, what do you want? Obedient workers. You want people whose first loyalty is to you, who show up on Monday morning, who work through the weekend, who give you their all, who give you their lives. And in return you give them a paycheck but you give them no loyalty and no promise of long term commitment. It’s a continuous one-night stand. You’re just hooking up. You’re being used. That’s true.

Contrast that with the relationship you have with the people you love — your best friends, your family, the people with whom you have sincere intimate personal relationships. They’re there for you no matter what. And when you get the diagnosis, or you get laid off from your job, or when things turn bad, when you have to wear a mask ‘cause you ride your bike, or the world falls apart, those are the people who are there for you. Those are the people who care about you, who actually care about you.

They’re not the ones who are telling you, “Oh we really care about you because of the way you look and we’re on your side.” These are the people who are actually on your side. Who are gonna loan you money or let you sleep on the couch or talk you through a tragedy in your own life. Those are the relationships that matter. They’re the only relationships that matter, and they’re almost never the relationship you have with your employer if you work for a huge company. I’m sorry, it’s just true.

So what you’re seeing — what you’re seeing — and you see it up and down American society — is the triumph of the values of those people over the values that we hold and that made this country great. And if you’re wondering why American families are falling apart, and if you’re wondering why every directive you hear from Washington divides you from your family, that’s why. Because they want your first loyalty to be to them.

So the question in a circumstance like this is what do you do about it? How do you respond to it? And the first thing you need to know is what’s actually happening. . . . Your enemy, as horrible as they are, is not some crazed ideologue wearing black, spray painting statues. That person is loathsome and should be in jail, trust me. I call for that nightly. But your actual enemy is the person who’s funding him and making that kind of behavior possible. And doing it for a very specific reason. To tear down the past, to destroy the past.

Now why do they want to destroy the past? Because when you destroy the past you eliminate all reference points. If you have no idea what came before you, you have no idea what normal is. And you cannot understand the consequences of what’s happening now if you can’t look to the past and understand the consequences of the same behavior in another time.

###

The second thing to know is that small is almost always better than big. That’s the truth. The circle of people in your life who care enough about you to help you when things go wrong is really small. There are a lot of people — your friends [with on] Instagram or Facebook or whatever in the fake digital world that we’ve been lulled into participating in– But the actual number of people who will take affirmative steps to help you is very, very small. It’s not 350 million. That’s how many people are in this country. It’s not seven billion. It’s like eight. So your loyalty always has to be to them, to your family and your closest friends above anything else. Period. And anyone who tells you otherwise — Anyone who tells you that your real loyalty’s gotta be to some larger group of people, some political group or some group of people who look like you — Give ‘em your middle finger. Those are your enemies. I’m serious. I’m serious. They are trying to destroy the fortifications that will protect you through life which are the people you love and who love you back.

###

Power from a company like Google is completely resistant to your views. They don’t care what you think and they have no reason to care what you think. Okay? So here’s the way I think about it. All this stuff that’s going on — there’s very little that we can actually control. Let’s just be totally honest about that. And by the way, you should always keep that in mind through life. You have less control than you think you do. You didn’t control your birth, you can’t add an hour to your life. You just can’t. No one can, no one’s ever been able to, no one ever will be able to. So if you want to be wise and make clear headed decisions, just remember there are a lot of things you can’t control. . . . The thing that you can control is whether your personal life is happy, productive, and has inherent meaning. Period. And no one wants to say that because it never increases their power to encourage you to have a normal happy personal life. It never increases their power at all. In fact, it detracts from their power because you’re gonna wind up, finding someone, getting married, having kids, and being more loyal to them than to your political or corporate leaders. And that’s why they work against it. In fact, that is the main threat to their power.

And if you’re wondering why big companies across the country are now offering to freeze the eggs of their female employees, it’s not because they’re compassionate. It’s ‘cause they’re demanding that you give them the best years of your life to serve them. That you put off the thing that gives our lives meaning above all else, which is passing on your genes, having children — that’s the core meaning in life — that you put that off so you can sell more widgets for them and juice the stock price. And in return you get what? Nothing. They don’t know your last name. But they’ll freeze your eggs because, “We’re a compassionate and enlightened company.” Yeah. No. ‘Cause they want total control. And it shows you. Why are the big companies so in favor of social policies that degrade the family?

###

Anyone who encourages you to think for yourself, to be more independent-minded — and economically independent — not just have an independent conscience and think whatever you want — but be able to support yourself and your family — Anyone who encourages that is your friend. Anyone who tells you, “You can’t live without me, you need me — you need to be loyal to me — give me your everything,” — that person is a false god.

###

How should you live? . . . Here’s my prescription. Okay? The very first thing I would do, and I try to do every single day, is remember that it ends. Like the big lie in American life — and there are many lies — but the biggest lie, the one that has the deepest roots and the worst effects is that no one ever dies. That no one ever dies. It’s like the one topic — You could — I could get up here and, like, tell you about my sex life, not that you’d be interested. But I could get up here and say anything and, like, no one would be shocked. But the one thing that is completely shocking to people is that people die. Like that’s the verboten topic. Like no talking about that. It’s awful. And even now I can see people’s [sour] faces, like, “Ooh. Boo hoo. The death talk.” But it is also, at the same time, the one thing that’s true of every living person and has always been and always will be. There’s an end to it. It’s the basic fact of life. It is not just a fact. It is the basic fact. This play has a finale. And it does tell you something about the people in charge, and it’s the one topic they never want to discuss. “Are you kidding? We got medicine for that. Why don’t you exercise more? Are you joking?” But none of that in the end will change that unchanging fact. That’s called Nature. The people running our culture, our government, and our economy are fundamentally at war with Nature. I mean that in the broadest sense. They may claim to be environmentalists. None of them have ever gone outside, by the way. None of them. They can be environmentalists if they want, but they are fundamentally at war with Nature. The basic fact of Nature is that life begins, it has an arc, and then it ends. So what does that mean for you? It doesn’t mean be depressed. It means face it head on and think through the implications. There are many. Here’s the most basic: You don’t have the time you think you do. Don’t waste time. That’s the bottom line. Don’t waste time. And I mean literally not a second.

###

Don’t delay full life. The most upsetting trend from my perspective — in a country full of upsetting trends — is this idea that, “I’m gonna get married and have kids after I’m a success at work.” ‘Cause, like, the people at work are gonna, like, help you succeed so you can get married and have kids and leave the company? Yeah, I don’t think so. No. They’re gonna get what they can from you.

###

I really believe in actual diversity where there’s a robust debate, where two sides each have a position, we kind of talk it out, and — like you know, one wins but it’s a pretty fair fight. It’s not where we are now. So I look at this and I’m like, “Aw, man. Is it hopeless?” Like, can you actually beat Google, the government of China, and Goldman-Sachs? I don’t know. You gotta try. You know you gotta get out of bed in the morning and put your gloves on and go for it, right? You gotta tell the truth.  ‘Cause by the way, in the end no amount of money and no amount of praise from the world’s dumb people — no amount of fake awards, the stupid little merit badges they give — the Pulitzer Prize — the Nobel Prize — “I got a Rhodes Fellowship.” Oh shut up. It doesn’t mean anything. “I got into Princeton.” Oh, be quiet. None of that means anything. And none of that is worth betraying what you know to be true.

###

You don’t have to participate in the society that people who hate you and your values created. That’s the truth. I never thought I’d be standing on the stage suggesting that people opt out of the popular society, but that is exactly what I’m suggesting.

###

No, if you want to be a veterinarian or an engineer, whatever, there’re all kinds of higher education paths that are necessary. I mean, if you’re gonna drill my bicuspids I want you to go to dental school. I’m not against education. But the liberal arts conventional, “I want a communications degree from Penn State –” No you don’t. I’m sorry, you don’t. You don’t. And it’ll be worth nothing. You’re gonna be deeply indebted and there’s a very good chance that it will hurt you is the truth. That it will hurt you.

###

Pay attention to who you are. Do the thing that you are naturally good at, that you love without being prompted, that you would do for free. That’s totally true. Don’t lie to yourself. The biggest lie is that, “You can be whatever you want to be.” What? No you can’t. You can take the skills that God gave you, and you can use them to maximum effect. That’s true.

 

Featured photo credit above: Toni Pecoraro, CC BY-SA 3.0, via Wikimedia Commons

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